Free

We're just as free
Free as we'll ever be


Dear Zac Brown Band, thank you for reminding us that country music can be, and should be, simple. In an age of rhinestone cowboys, Zac Brown and company manages to bring country back to its roots. Sometimes, less really is more. I have a Pandora station devoted to the Zac Brown Band, and every song that comes up is elegantly simple with thoughtful lyrics and a unique sound; it makes for a great summertime playlist.

Their latest hit Free was stuck in my head this morning. Ironically enough, it was while I was taking my first practice MCAT. It's really helpful to have a song about being free and living a simple country life with your love while taking a standardized test. Really. Studying for the MCAT is going well. I'm trying not to burn out too early but still get my work done, which averages out to about 4-6 hours of studying a day. This number makes the average student cringe, but I am no average student. I'm a super nerd; I have a higher tolerance for studying. I never realized how lame that sounds until I said it just now. Most people in college build up their tolerance for Keystone and Cap'n Mo... I'm just that cool.

This is what the end of a typical study day feels like.

M-kitteh?

Coffee shop owners around town are starting to recognize me. This was an actual conversation between myself and the owner of Common Grounds, my new MCAT study spot:

Owner: Oh you're back again! More MCAT studying today?
Me: Yeah, you're going to see a lot of me this summer...
Owner: Oh good! Regular soy latte?
Me: Yes please.
Owner: And do you have one of our frequent customer cards?
Me: No, but I probably should get one... I'm going to be here a lot...

I ran into my bio instructor from my prep class (who is a med student at UCD) at the coffee shop and he came over to my table to chat with me for awhile about school, MCATs, traveling, and the like. Med students are pretty great, I have discovered, because they are not far removed from the heinousness of undergrad science courses and entrance exams and applications, so they are remarkably chill and have great advice to offer. I have also made some pretty cool friends in class, and y'all know how I feel about friends :) MCAT class is a funny setting. Sometimes I wish I could just focus on the people rather than the information, like a sociologist would. If I could, I would just go to class and observe, listen. From only one week of class, I have determined that pre-med students fall in a couple distinct categories made up of roughly the following percentages: 74% awkward quiet nerdy "typical" pre-meds, 3.7% people that you wonder how they tie their shoes let alone plan for a career in medicine, 6.3% people that seem normal at first but they eventually reveal quirks and strange personality traits that makes you second-guess their apparent normalcy, and the remaining 16% are actually normal. I try to make friends with the 16%. And as we learned in chemistry and grammar school, respectively, like dissolves like and birds of a feather flock together. I would like to consider myself normal...

As weird as it sounds, I am really enjoying this whole MCAT deal. Before you call the nearest mental institution to see if they have an open bed for me, just hear me out: I have wanted to be a doctor since I was six years old. SIX. For those of you keeping score at home, this whole journey is almost fifteen years in the making... and I'm still so far away. So finally, after so many years of waiting, I am doing something about it. And it's a great feeling. As I have said a few times, it has been such an up and down year for me, and things have been looking up pretty consistently for the last few months, finally. Preparing for this exam is enjoyable for me. I am taking concrete steps toward making my dreams a reality. And speaking of dreams, I have had this recurring dream (at least 3 times now) that I receive a 38 on the MCAT. God, if you are reading this, please please please let this be a sign. With a 38, they'll be banging down my door with acceptance letters. I really hope that dreams are some sort of sign because if so... shoot. People ask me if I am scared to graduate next year. I am by no means scared; I have a plan, and a couple backup plans (you can never be too prepared). Being scared to graduate and not wanting to graduate, however, are two different animals. College is awesome. It is a cruel cosmic joke that it only lasts for four years. But I know that I have a wonderful future waiting for me on the other side of this four-year journey, so I think I'll be okay :)

It may not seem to the untrained eye like I am "free" this summer. Maybe I'm not. But there is a liberating feeling associated with being prepared and ready to take on the future. I have no idea what to expect down the road, but I won't be facing the mysterious whatever unarmed. And apparently it only gets harder from here, so maybe I am just as free as I'll ever be right now. That's fine by me, because I couldn't be happier to be alive and well and oh so blessed :)

Love Like Crazy ♥

Be a best friend
Tell the truth
And overuse "I love you"
And go to work
Do your best
Don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin' knees get lazy
And love like crazy


This has got to be the best damn advice I have ever heard. My hat is off to Lee Brice for capturing in song the recipe for success and happiness. If more people followed this song as a model for how to live, we would have a perfect world.

At first glance, it doesn't seem remarkably profound, or even difficult. Be a best friend? Easy! I have tons of friends! Okay Mr. Popular. Have you ever been trapped in a place so dark and so alone, unable to find your own way out, until a friend came along to carry you, with a lantern to light your way? Have you ever been that beacon, that savior for somebody when they needed you most? Those are some mighty big boots to fill. Be that best friend, because you might need one someday when you least expect.


Tell the truth??? C'mon, that's obvious! Oh is it? Ever lied to your boss to get out of work? Lied to your parents to get out of trouble? Lied to a friend to stay in their good graces? Lied to yourself? I lied to my parents. Once. I got grounded from the car for a week. I have lied to myself a time or two, convincing myself of things that (clearly) were not so. I ended up in tears. And on the flip-side, I have been lied to by people I care about; honestly, I would rather someone spit in my face than lie to me. It is true what they say that the truth shall set you free. So tell the truth. And don't put up with people who don't.

Overuse "I love you"? It will lose its meaning and it gets old. Telling the special people in your life that you love them should never get old. You should love saying the L word so much that you can never get enough of it. I say "I love you" so many times a day, and yet (despite what some may have you believe) it never loses its meaning because I mean it every. single. time. If you don't mean it, maybe you should take a look in the mirror. Do you even love yourself? If not, how can you possibly have the clarity to love another? No one deserves to be on the short end of that stick. Say "I love you" until you are blue in the face... and then say it some more.

Go to work and do your best. Boring. You get what you give, my friend, you get what you give. Do your best and you get the best. Half-ass it and you will get half-assed in return. It's the Golden Rule, do unto others and whatnot. Don't sell yourself short, and don't short-change everyone else in the process.

Don't outsmart your common sense? What does that even mean? Let me help you out here. Sometimes we have a tendency to think we know better than... well... what it is we know. Remember when you were little and you did something wrong and mom and dad would say "you know better"? Well, the truth of that statement didn't stop with childhood. Even as adults, we make stupid choices. I know I do. Because at our age, we think we know better than everyone. "I'm the only one who has to live my life and I know what I need to be happy." I can give you that one. I sure as hell don't know what exactly you need, but I can usually make a pretty good guess; people are hard to figure out occasionally, but rarely are they impossible. But if you ever have the slightest gut instinct that it's not a good idea, an infinitesimal instinct even, it is probably not the best decision you will ever make. Let your common sense guide you, because if you think you know better than your instincts, you aren't going to get too far. That's how our species managed to make it this long: by not being stupid.

Never let your prayin' knees get lazy. I'm not into that. Okay, I can respect that. Once again, I reference the "trapped in a place so dark and so alone" scenario. Whether you are asking for help from your God/deity/spiritual leader or you feel like you are just asking rhetorical questions to yourself in the dark, that is praying. You don't have to ascribe to any system of belief to ask for help or to say "thank you." All you need is a little humility and an open mind to whatever presents itself, however it presents itself. Give thanks for what you have and don't be afraid to ask for help; it is not a sign of weakness but of strength and great character.

And love like crazy.

Crazy Town

Roll into town, step off the bus
Shake off the where you came from dust
Grab your guitar, walk down the street
The sign says "Nashville, Tennessee"


Every blog needs a schtick. My schtick was to relate my life to music given my very musical family and background. But today I'm just going to talk about some music. Because I can. I spent this evening on the beautiful open road of Central California on my way back to school for the summer.

This is my yellow brick road. "Of course, some people do go both ways." 

-Scarecrow, The Wizard of Oz.

If only it were that easy...

Though I hail from the suburbs, I live near the country. I eat locally grown produce. If I drive for about 10 minutes in any direction, I am surrounded by farms. I have been to an Ag Showcase (they were selling tractors and other fun things!). I ain't no city slicker. BAM! Authenticity. So I turned on my "Summer in the Country" playlist, rolled down the windows, and rocked out the whole way. And today, this man captured my ears and heart.

Hot damn. I will go for a ride on your tractor any day. 

No really, he probably drives a John Deere.

Jason Aldean. I would love to wake up every morning next to that smooth sexy drawl. Wow, did I just say that out loud? That's uncomfortable. Anyway, I have always loved Jason Aldean even though he hasn't quite made it to Urban/Paisley/Chesney fame (he is pretty up there though). Don't get me wrong, people know him; he is important and has many leather-bound books and his apartment smells of rich mahogany. His talent precedes his name, a quality that is oh-so-rare in music today. His songs have this hard-rock-meets-country thing going on; if there was no fiddle in the intro, you would never know you were about to listen to *GASP* a country song (Give it a listen before you hate; I have converted many nonbelievers). In my mind, this man can do no wrong. Whether he's taking you for a ride on his big green tractor (Big Green Tractor, and no, that is not an innuendo), asking for forgiveness (Why), sittin' and reminiscin' (Laughed Until We Cried), gettin' down in a hicktown (Hicktown), or living off the tips from a pickle jar (Crazy Town). Jason Aldean is a consistent hit-maker. But he didn't start out that way. No one does.


You pay your dues and you play for free
And pray for a honky-tonk destiny.

Which got me thinking. How much cooler would my life be if I pulled a fast one, blew off the university lifestyle, packed my bags and headed for Nashville?

It's a crazy town full of neon dreams
Everybody plays, everybody sings
Hollywood with a touch of twang
To be a star you gotta bang bang bang
Bend those strings 'til the Hank comes out
Make all the drunk girls scream and shout
We love it, we hate it, we're all just tryin' to make it in this crazy town


Right now, I have it pretty good and cushy. I live in a sorority house, I go to school and intern, and I'm planning my future (also cushy) life as a doctor wherein I will drive a nice car, have 2.5 children and a dog and a Dr. Husband McDreamypants, and probably be a soccer mom (bleh! Future children, listen up: play baseball or volleyball, otherwise mommy won't love you. Not true, but kind of). That's nice. But it's not badass. It's not the kind of life that you hear about and say "Wow! That's awesome!" (more like "Wow! She probably has great health insurance." You can put that on my tombstone). Let's compare: 20-year-old girl drops out of college, leaves cushy life behind, grabs her keyboard and boards the next plane bound for Crazy Town. Plays the Nashville scene, a different bar every night hoping to get noticed, living day-to-day trying to get by...

One year they repossess your truck


... and then one day... 


And the next you make a couple million bucks


...you're this girl. Holy hell!

Granted, T. Swift is not what we would call "badass" in any language, but she is doing alright for herself. Okay, back to the Crazy Town. Becoming a professional musician/badass has never really been my calling. Some people are just born with it. My dad, for instance, was born to be a rock star. Though he never achieved fame, he followed his passion and ended up with a job in the music industry that he loved and, at age 60, he still plays every day, rocks out with his band weekly, and has a nice little guitar and bass collection (I think he's got about 40 now? Excessive? Yes). I was not born to be a rock star, but I was born with a bit of a talent for the piano. So a small part of me will always wonder what if? What if I ditched this scholarship-studious-sorority-good-girl life and pursued that talent?

You know, no thanks. I'm very happy with what I've got. That kind of lifestyle would drive me nuts. The late nights. The uncertainty. The never knowing if people are being sincere. The disappointment after disappointment before finally... maybe... making it. I am too square. Simply not badass enough. I'll leave it to Jason Aldean; he's pretty good at it. (Call me).

When The Sun Goes Down

All day long just takin' it easy

Layin' in the hammock where it's nice and breezy

Sleepin' off the night before

'Cause when the sun goes down we'll be back for more.

Summer :) It's About. Damn. Time.


It has been quite some time since I've posted anything -- sorry about that. Here's what I've been up against: I have some exciting news to share (see below, don't want to spoil the surprise yet!) I was sick as a dog for several days and could barely get out of bed, I went to Lake Shasta for Memorial Day Weekend with my best friends, I owned some finals and papers, and now I'm home enjoying the glory that is summer vacation :) Allow me to catch you up to speed:


First things first: I am incredibly honored to be the recipient of the Bettie Locke Hamilton Founder's Memorial Scholarship from the Kappa Alpha Theta Foundation! My mom called me a couple weeks ago when the letter came in the mail and I screamed and burst into tears of joy. This scholarship is incredibly competitive -- 4 women receive the $12,000 award out of over 125 nominees. When I was nominated, I never dreamed in a million years that I would actually receive this honor; it meant the world to me to even be nominated by my chapter. So I would like to say thank you with all of my heart and soul to my wonderful sisters at the Zeta Nu chapter at UC Davis, and the Theta collegians and alumnae who made this award possible. And of course, Miss Bettie Lock Hamilton :)

Bettie Locke Hamilton

Bettie, because you were a trailblazer, Kappa Alpha Theta became the first Greek-letter organization for women in 1870. Two-hundred forty years later, you have afforded me an amazing opportunity, and I can't thank you enough. I plan to study abroad next summer thanks to this wonderful honor! Keep your eyes peeled for more from me about that, but I'm seriously looking into programs in Italy, Spain, and Germany... Stay tuned :)

The following morning, I woke up with the worst sore throat of my life. Just the way I wanted to celebrate my accomplishment :( I took a flashlight to my throat and saw what I thought were the tell-tale signs of Strep throat. Disheartened and in pain, I made my way to urgent care. A rapid strep test proved me wrong. Turns out what I had was viral, which meant three things to me: 1) no medication would make it go away, 2) it was more contagious which means I had to basically isolate myself, and 3) it would be more brutal. Got home, got back into bed, and never looked back... for like 4 days. I pretty much camped out in bed, sleeping for double digit hours, waking up, going back to sleep for the rest of the day. It was a damn good time (not).

I recovered just in time, though, for Houseboats. For those readers unfamiliar with the concept of houseboats, imagine Spring Break in Cabo San Lucas. Then substitute the tropical for the NorCal (you know, think lots of trees and poison oak). Now, add some boats. And about a million amazing memories. Lake Shasta is one of the most gorgeous places I've ever seen...

On this gorgeous lake underneath the warm summer sun, I spent a fun-filled weekend with my best friends. So many great stories and I have no idea where to even start. Meeting not one but two bachelor party boats, watching people eat it coming down the island, the Cougar Slayer, singing country songs with the bachelor party, Emily getting serenaded to Frank Sinatra, cheering for BDP as he worked his game, the list goes on and on and on. There are a few songs whose meanings to me have been forever changed thanks to Houseboats: I'm On a Boat (naturally), Shots, Carry Out, and (for me and Emily) anything by Kenny Chesney.

Now I'm rambling. Let's see, found the best coffee in the universe in Red Bluff, CA. The Human Bean. If you happen to find yourself in Red Bluff for whatever reason (we won't ask questions), PLEASE go give them your business! Not only were they the nicest people, but they make a mighty fine cup o' joe. Order a "Snickers". Trust me. Your life will never be the same.

The week following Houseboats (last week) is all kind of a distant jittery memory at this point. Exams and papers and finals, oh my! I was drinking Go Girls and lattes like they were water. Mistake #1. I must say, however, this quarter's Week 10/Finals was pretty fun -- well, as fun as finals can be. We were all so delirious that everything became a joke, a party, a laugh and a half. Jessica and I sang Britney and Backstreet, Kirstin and I educated the parlor about the dangers of various STIs (ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS use the toilet seat covers), and Marina just laughed a lot. Monday morning I took 2 finals, and by Monday afternoon I was on 99 South :) Had to stop for caffeine along the way; detox is hard.

Where the hell was THIS during finals week???

Home. Sweet. Home! What have I done to enjoy my summer vacation so far? Well, I listened to a lot of Kenny Chesney, had a grilled turkey and swiss from my fave -- The Berrock Shop (old habits die hard!), lounged around the pool, worked on my tan, played with my puppy, got fro-yo, watched Glee with the bestie... a productive break so far :) I have 2 more weeks of this until it's back to the grind in the 530: internships (which I love, please don't get me wrong!) and studying for the MCAT...

I don't really know what to make of this, but it is cute and it

popped up under "mcat" on google image search.

Don't they look happy? They took the MCAT!

Fisiks... I understandz itz... NOT.

And on that note, "when the sun sinks down over the water, everything gets hotter when the sun goes down" :) Summertime and the livin' is easy!